the wondering years

Feb. 10, 2012 at 12:24pm with 22 notes

Reblogged from tetw

The Sanguine Sex

by Caitlin Flanagan

Women will always have emotional needs that they can fill through sex, and men will always use those needs to their advantage. But men will never bear the brunt of sexuality.

There’s something incredibly tragic about the way we’re built to relate to one another as men and women when sex gets involved.

I think, as this piece seems to suggest, that it’s based largely on the fact that for women, sex is always tied on some level to reproduction, to children. That’s an inescapable fact of biology. Sex means children, whether we’re avoiding them, trying for them, excited for them, or doing everything in our power to stay far far away from them. Of course, we couldn’t be doing everything in our power, right? If we were doing everything in our power to not open ourselves to that part of life we might not be ready for, we wouldn’t be having sex at all.

Some women might be better at convincing themselves that they’re okay with that option. I’m not one of those. I believe sex is a basic human right.

But no matter what - it’s a woman’s lot to carry the full responsibility of a child. A man can be as involved (or not involved) as he wants to. That’s what’s scary. And tragic.

While we’re on the subject, I want to say I do not share the author’s “sympathy” for (I refuse to call them “pro-life”) anti-choice advocates. Fuck you, Catholic Church. Fuck you. I can’t even really be mad at Obama for this “accommodation” offering because I know what kind of foe he’s up against in this and you are fucking devious. You are fucking evil. YOU are the snake in the garden, and not the good kind that opens the door to wisdom and knowledge. You’re like the mammoth Burmese pythons that have been invading the Florida Everglades - unwanted, out of place, and terrifying. I want you gone from my world.